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36 records found.

I can hear everything Feb 16, 2004, 03:00 EST

By Jesse Hicks

In the end, the video camera, sketchbook and tape recorder proved useless – incoherent gibberish and videotape of my forehead: “Can you see inside my mind yet?” The notebook was only slightly more useful: page after page of relative nonsense like “DEAD EYES” scrawled in inch-high letters.

I Copied a File Sep 23, 2002, 02:00 EDT

By Jason MacIsaac

I am so proud of myself. I copied a file. I can't tell you what a sense of accomplishment I feel. I took a file from the hard drive, and copied it to a 3.5 inch diskette. When I checked the disk to see that file was there and saw that it was, I was ecstatic, in a nearly lost-my-virginity fashion. And don't mock me. I'll bet there's a lot of people who could not have copied that file, at least the way I did. Let me explain.

I Dropped My Pen...Time for a Killing Spree Oct 19, 1998, 04:00 EDT

By Jason MacIsaac

It's the little things.

When bad things happen, I mean really bad things, the human brain has a built in defense. Get fired? Found out someone murdered your family? Caught a raging disease that will slowly kill and give you excessive flatulence? No problem. Such life-shattering events are too much for the brain to handle, so it doesn't even try.

I Earn More Money Than You, Little Boy Jun 24, 2003, 05:00 EDT

By Lilith DemHareIs

"I earn more money than you, little boy, that's how," I tell the envious little sprog when he expresses a whining jealousy over the lovely home theatre I've created in my home. They come over with their parents or friends, see our setup, and wish they had one. More often than not (depending on their breeding and manners), they whine to their parents about why they don't have a similar setup at home.

I give up !!!! Microsoft all is forgiven Mar 17, 1997, 05:00 EST

I Hate The Man In Salesman Oct 20, 2003, 03:00 EDT

By Richard Campbell

I have absolutely no background in the field of sales at all, even remotely. That night I get a call, I've passed! For a bunch of sales-whores they sure do know how to make an easy "Answer-what-we-want-to-hear-not-what-we-want-you-to-think" question form. That should have had me running.

I have this on a poster on my wall Jan 12, 1998, 03:00 EST

Submitted by Theresa Toth

I met my father for the first time today Dec 2, 1998, 02:00 EST

By Theresa Toth

I met my father for the first time today... now, don't think this is one of those long lost "I've never met my father until now" situations. I've always known my father... or at least I thought I did. Let me explain...(don't worry, I'll keep it brief).

I Need a Stupid Job May 24, 2005, 02:00 EDT

By graham

More and more, he makes the point that as awareness of our own futility in the greater cause of the corporate 'cog in the wheel' prospect grows, combined with the urgings within most of us to somehow be the masters of own pop cultural domains, we want to make shit. Or do shit.

I Nerdicus Sep 24, 2001, 02:00 EDT

By Rolo

Me Nerd. Yes I'm a nerd. Suffice to say I won't be the type to go trekkie conventions with Spock ears, but I sure do love to ogle at the Starships and read their specs. I guess I'm what you call a Sleeper Latent Nerd. Or a Part-time nerd.

I Tried, Dad Jan 26, 2004, 05:00 EST

By Pat Adams

“I tried Dad," Ron bellowed, clutching the corpse of his father. Though only dead a short time, the flesh was already growing cold. The stench of death was spreading to cover up the odor of spilled beer coming from a half-dented can of Lone Star. The old man looked so peaceful once Ron had closed his eyes and smoothed the angry scowl he was wearing when he died.

I want Money Feb 17, 1997, 03:00 EST

I Want My MPFree Jun 26, 2000, 04:00 EDT

By John Iadipaolo

Mere months ago, 75% of the public was content in knowing that, if they put their treasured Britney Spears CD into their computer, it would play. Now, suddenly, people are talking about MP3s--sound files that offer audio quality comparable to a compact disc, but at a fraction of the size of a ripped CD track. Thanks to everyone from Time magazine to the New York Post, the same person who was content listening to 'Hit Me Baby One More Time' on their Spears CD can now duplicate and trade the entire album over the net using free products like RealJukebox and Napster in a matter of minutes. The process is quick, easy--and 100% free.

I Wanted to be Invisible Apr 22, 2005, 03:00 EDT

By Robert Levin

I felt this way because I'd always had an exceptionally inquisitive mind, a mind that, forever in search of the deepest truths, often compelled me to challenge things (the assumption that boundary lines in nature are fixed and inviolable for example) that others never questioned.

I Write Therefore I Am Jun 26, 2000, 02:00 EDT

By Samantha Craggs

Today I handed over a manila envelope containing five of my best short stories and the first chapter of my newly-completed novel to a reporter who works in the same newsroom as me. Entrusting her with these documents was like handing over a chunk of my personality. "Thanks," she said. "I've never known a real writer."

I'm Somebody's Evil Twin Dec 17, 1999, 02:00 EST

By Jason MacIsaac

He's not from the evil parallel dimension. You know, the one Captain Kirk was accidentally sent to where all the evil counterparts of the Enterprise had a beard (I think even Uhura had one). He's not from the evil parallel dimension, though I might be. I'm the one with the beard.

I've Been Poisoned Jul 24, 2000, 05:00 EDT

By Samantha Craggs

When I was about 14 and determined to be a rock star, I wrote a song called "I've Been Poisoned." It was mostly just heavy drum beats, kind of like Queen's "We Will Rock You." There is no way in hell you're going to get me to recite the lyrics, but suffice it to say I was a big Poison fan. Biiig Poison fan.

I've Never Seen Anything Like This Sep 24, 2001, 04:00 EDT

By Eric Rosenfield

I am holding in my hands a piece of paper from the World Trade Center that I found lying on the ground in the financial district. It is an expense report from a company called "Cantor Fitzgerald", written by a man named David R. Meyer.

If You're Happy And You Know It, Bomb Iraq Feb 17, 2003, 02:00 EST

By ex-P.F.C. Wintergreen

When U.S. Secretary General Colin Powell finished his presentation to the United Nations about the wrongdoing of Saddam Hussein's regime, many debates started about the validity of his evidence. While some took the presentation as a clear sign of what the Iraqi leader was doing, others argued that if the United States wanted to provide compelling evidence, it would've been only fair to expose their intelligence gathering capabilities as proof.

IMPROV Jun 22, 1998, 05:00 EDT

By IMPROV

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