Almost barred on barf

While pursuing one of the final credits for my Bachelor of Fine Arts Degree at a well known Toronto University, I happened to enter a class dealing with the politics of art, held at one of the most prominant art galleries in Ontario. As a term project, debates were assigned. Since my last name is what it is, I was given last pick. Fortunately or so I thought, I was assigned a rather interesting subject--that of Jubal Brown, the "barfing art critic." (1)

In attempt to do reasearch for the debate, I endeavoured to see one of the paintings Jubal saw as being so banal that it became part one of his primary colours triology. As you may know, Jubal Brown has been banned from this gallery. After purchasing my admissions ticket, I innocently asked for directions to this specific painting. The gallery attendant was unaware of the painting to which I was refering. In order to clarify, I nonchallantly said, "Oh, you know, the one Jubal Brown heaved on."

Immediately the attendant was on the phone to her supervisor, asking where was the location of the painting.

The attendant then blurted, "Do you know him!?"

"No, why?" I replied bewilderedly.

She then opened a drawer behind the counter and pulled out a poster of the artist. The caption contained a remark stating that neither he nor his cohorts were to be let into the gallery, and if they attempted to purchase tickets they were to be barred.

So thats how I almost got barred on barf.

Anon.

A Statement about Modern Art.

Ontario College of Art student Jubal Brown told the Associated Press in November that it was he who vomited publicly on two masterpieces this year and that he plans a third episode. At the Art Gallery of Ontario in May, he regurgitated red food coloring on a Raoul Dufy work, and at New York City's Museum of Modern Art on November 2, he threw up in blue on a Piet Modrian painting. His third work will be in yellow. His goal, he said, is "to liberate individuals and living creatures from [art's] banal, oppressive representation."