How do I Lose Weight?

[Some nonsense about "how do I lose weight" cut...]

<Sh0ckWave> What's the best way to say "Mom, i'm fat. I wanna go on a diet."?
<Konrad> shock: or try getting your jaw broken
<blreeves> any humans her that want to talk to an 18/m?
<megs> talk to your pediatrician
<Konrad> blreeves: Yes, I'm a 55/m
<blreeves> Somebody DCC me please
<Konrad> blreeves: I enjoy watchin animals urniate. wanna cyber?
<Sh0ckWave> I heard of this thing, you take all carbohydrates and a lot of sugar out of your diet, and BOOM, 10kg(the most) a week.
<megs> i've found that trauma is a good way to lose weight
* Sivad sighs.
<Chewbacca> ive found that not eating is also a good way....
<Konrad> shock: or you could try getting tapeworms. make you thinner in no time
<Pixiestix> shock: you don't wanna lose too much at once... then it won't stay off
<`Minx> hahaha, ewww
<megs> hey
<megs> they actually sell tapeworms
<Sh0ckWave> Nothing too derastic :>
<megs> i had a zoo prof who ahd a friend who ate one on purpose so he could eat whatever he wanted and stay thin
<Konrad> Have you tried the "Weight Loss Fast" book of the Do-It-Yourself Surgery Series?
<Konrad> it's great. I recommend the entire do it yourself surgery series

Konrad is not listening to you. Furthermore, he will not stop screaming at your shoes until you admit you have a mental imbalance.